Failing is painful in academia.
Rejection hurts, mentally and almost physically.
And you get plenty of it. You get it MUCH MORE than success.
So, it’s very tough. We need to learn to cope with failing to survive.
Here’s a simple formula:
Recharge … regroup … retry
1. Recharge = rest enough, take some time off from the screen, eat, relax, think of something else for a moment. Exercise is also good, as my friend Simo Hosio can testify.
2. Regroup = systematically analyze why you failed and/or how to improve. If it’s a paper rejection, put the reviewer comments in a table. When *anything* is in tabular structure, it piece by piece becomes manageable. This helps a lot.
3. Retry = If the paper was desk rejected without comments, just get it immediately back out there (= submit elsewhere). If you got those comments, work on them one by one until you’ve addressed all worth addressing.
As long as you don’t give up, as long as you keep trying, you can’t lose. Ultimately, you will win. So, this recipe is “simple” and “self evident”, but it’s true. I’ve seen it happen, many times. More brilliant people who give up, give up. Less brilliant people who keep trying, end up winning. Just because they refused to give up. The universe (and people around you) will notice this eventually and you will be rewarded. It’s just how it is.
Also, psychologically, it is CRUCIAL to speak out about how feel. B*tch, moan, cry, get angry … do whatever FEELS right. Don’t bottle it up. You are entitled to your feelings. Here, it helps to have a TEAM or SUPERVISOR that listens (or, if you don’t have those, maybe a partner — I’ve even complained to a Pikachu (see the pic of the cutie :)! And it helped.).
So, get it out. Get over it. And then try again. Period.
ps. Sometimes failures sum up and you feel that you get NOTHING but that. This is also normal. People who’ve been in academia for a long time know that ‘things come in waves’—-one year, all you get are failures. The next year, everything you touch turns to gold, pretty much. I have no clue why this is, but seen it happening multiple times. That’s another reason why “just keep trying” is the optimal strategy for you.